Welcome Back to Ova East
I do a lot of thinking about thinking. In education and art, it centers around being “meta” (not the renamed company capitulating to 47). I have always liked poems about being a poem. Nikki Giovanni’s “Kidnap Poem” probably being the first one I ever encountered. As an educator, I felt like being “meta” was like “showing your work in math”. It also is helpful for audiences, commentators, visitors, students, etc to know where you are going and why you are going that way or using this strategy. So every once in a while, I will take you inside my head to share not just how I think about an issue but how I landed on that issue for that week’s column, essay or screed.
My first “meta” parallel is that I was wondering how people utilize social media and what their real “why” is for using it that way. I am often in many conversations with people that deal with young people (at my age anyone under 30 honestly) and they often lament at the use of cell phones and wonder why can’t it be like it used to be “back in the day”. My screed on nostalgia will come at a later date. Ultimately, for adults, I have a “get it how you live” perspective. Or as a great dear and old friend of mine would say long ago, “if you like it, then I love it”. I don’t want to be a junior therapist. I think we all seek connection on social media and sometimes we are using it to figure out who we are at all ages. However, I am able to have these conversations with myself and gather the opinions of others because I spend time with a professional therapist weekly to examine myself why I think the way I do, why I react the way I do and healthy ways to keep anxiety and depression at bay. Mental Health Matters! Black Male Mental Health Matters!
These examinations many times lead me to a root cause analysis. How do we get to the bottom of this problem? If we are just looking at the top layer cause and effect, we will never get to true change in any community, institution, work place or relationship.
So now, the final layer (the onion is being peeled back) is how I argue and how I teach and how I try to solve problems. Essentially, do we agree on the terms or jargon in these spaces in order to say what we mean and mean what we say. DEI for example. The way 47’s executive orders define DEI is making america great again to go back to before Carter G. Woodson founded Negro History Week. DEI is anything that might level the playing field for any group who is not a cis-gendered hetero-normative white male. The example I often gave as a writing teacher and teacher of argument. Argument of Definition! We often say we “love” people but do we agree on what “love” means and in which contexts. I often use the example of romantic love and people believing with agreeing on the definition that an “I love you” means monogamy, commitment and on the path to marriage. Where for some, “I love you” means right now in this moment “I do love you” and tomorrow in another moment with another person I could love them romantically too.
Therefore, at times, we don’t agree on the terms. We don’t know what the terms mean. We don’t take the time to discuss, agree on the terms and rules of engagement to then have the proper conversation. Earlier I declared Mental Health Matters! What do we mean when we say that? I will define it for you now. Going to a licensed therapist matters because a person with training to help you with your outlook on life is like listening to a friend when you are sick. They could be correct, but I want to try to get my information from a trained professional. This is like the difference between going to work out with a friend and going to a trainer. Your friend may be in great shape and does what works for them, but you may want to get a regimen from a trained licensed professional to help you with your goals. Next, take care of yourself both mentally and physically so you have to know what that means for you by going to your internist, dentist, optometrist and getting baseline information. Another way to care for yourself is to do things that put you in a good mood: walk, run, exercise, shop, meet up with friends, play games, watch a movie, listen to music, dance, etc etc. This is not an exhaustive list, but as I try to be the change that I want to see in the world. When I exclaim, that your mental health matters, it is directly connected to your physical health, and I proclaim on a daily basis that I would like mental, physical, spiritual, social and emotional health for my family and those around me.
This is part 2 of the getting know me stacks!